2013 - Tantric Massage London

To my darling son, I know you have watched porn and I know this is not a conversation any boy wants to have with his mum. So I will spare you from having a face-to-face conversation with me about porn. I would be failing in my duty as a parent, guide, woman if I did not share with you the following information which has the power to impact greatly upon your future sex life and relationships. There is nothing wrong with being interested in sex and this is not a moral question. But it is a proven fact that men who watch a lot of porn have trouble enjoying real sex with real women. And I don’t want you to be that guy – not for yourself and not for your partners. I truly wish you and your generation could have been free to embark on your sex lives free from all the hardcore, soulless, sexist imagery of porn. I wish you could all have had the chance to explore it organically, with all the surprises, the thrills and even the spills. That’s how it was in the olden days – sex for us was a wonderful, sometimes awkward experience… Read more »

Nelson Mandela passed away on December 5th, 2013 He was imprisoned for 27 years by the South African apartheid government. His crime? Standing up against a government that was committing heinous human rights abuses against black South Africans. He was released from prison in 1990 and went on to lead the way for the abolition of apartheid in 1994. He was elected as South Africa’s first black president that same year. After suffering years of abuse, Nelson Mandela’s most astounding accomplishment was to create the Truth and Reconciliation Commission which focused on healing the country’s wounds from human rights abuses using truth-telling and forgiveness. I was moved, watching tv last night to see the members of the UN Security Council, standing in silence to honour Nelson Mandela, in recognition of the fact that he truly was a peacemaker. ‘I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers fear.’ ‘No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn… Read more »

Peace and happiness lie deep within us, in the very core of our being This is the teaching of Ramana Maharshi and all the great beings. We look for happiness outside of ourselves but happiness does not exist in any external object. – only in us who are the consciousness that experiences happiness……. Desire and fear agitate our mind and obscure from its vision the happiness and peace that always exist within it. When a desire is satisfied, or the cause of fear is removed, the surface agitation of our mind subsides and in that temporary calm, our mind enjoys a taste of its own innate happiness. Therefore to master the art of being happy, we must master the art and science of just being. We must discover what the innermost core of our being is and we must learn to abide consciously and constantly in that state of pure being. The art of just being, remaining fully conscious, but without any activity of the mind is not only an art – a practical skill that can be cultivated and applied to produce an experience of inexpressible beauty and joy – but also a science- an attempt to… Read more »

Have any of you been watching Masters of Sex on tv – channel 4? 4 out of 12 episodes have already been shown. Plenty of time to describe some of the interesting work of this couple who are now known as two pioneering researchers of human sexuality. The series is based on a biography by Thomas Maier, and we have already been given a hint of the disturbed life of Masters’ early years when he was beaten by his father, with his mother just choosing to ignore what was going on. In the tv programme, Masters is played by Martin Sheen (photo above left) and the photo on the right is of the real Masters, whose repression shows in his eyes and face. And yet, this is the man who fought to break convention and chose to devote his life to chronicling and measuring the sexual habits of the men and women of his time. Masters, and Virginia Johnson, who started off as his research assistant, became partners and recruited volunteers to shed their inhibitions and masturbate or have sex in laboratory conditions. They later wrote and published ‘Human Sexual Response’ in 1966,… Read more »

Yesterday was Tara’s last day with us. She has decided to move on, and will no longer be practicing tantric massage. We will all miss Tara’s bright smile and radiant personality. I will always remember when she joined us two years ago. At that time, she had no experience of massage at all, but somehow I decided to take her on because she had a special quality about her. Since then, she enrolled on several massage courses and trainings, and has become one of our most popular masseuses. She has her own brand of common sense and a quality of taking interest in others and wanting to make others feel good – one might call it ‘spirit’, which is quite unique. We received the following email this morning from one of our regular clients: ‘Just wanted to say my session with Tara yesterday was in a par with one of Celeste’s …..It left my face and fingers tingling as tho they were literally vibrating.’ We all wish Tara lots of luck and happiness in her new life. She certainly deserves it.

This is a gentleman’s willy care kit It might make a good joke Xmas present for a husband/ partner / lover/or an ex. And you will get a good laugh from the product description and the reviews on Amazon, which lists it for sale at £8.99. The Gentleman’s Willy Care Kit comes complete with fluffing brush, styling scissors, sprucing mirror and also ‘evening wear’ (?)………All these items come packed in a luxurious hard leather-look case to add a touch of class to this fine personal grooming collection. A must for every man on the move. Our thanks to the Dawn French fan page on facebook for bringing this item to our attention. It is very funny, but on a slightly more serious note, here at Tantric Massage in Kensington, we have noticed a huge change in men’s grooming habits over the years and since you often ask us our opinions on what we like, we thought we would give you some feedback on what we really like. We used to get asked questions like ‘ What do you think of my willy’ ? ‘Do you think it is long enough?” How does it compare with other men’s willies?’ etc…. Read more »

Girls everywhere masturbate. Why can’t we talk about it? Is the title of an article in the Telegraph which I found recently while browsing the internet. The author, Rebecca Holman, doesn’t say anything about tantric sex or tantric orgasm, but just plain old masturbation. And it struck me that what she was saying was true. Little by little, over the years, we have become more and more open about what we talk about and what words are allowed on television – and, as the author says, talk about vibrators is fine. We can go and buy them together, and it seems nowadays only a prude would admit to not owning a vibrator. ‘But we never discuss female masturbation on its own, without a purple, glittery, revolving phallus, without a man present, just for the sake of it.’ But men talk about wanking all the time – so why the double standard? It seems that it is the way we talk about it. Its fine to discuss in sex education classes and in relation to products (toys) and messages re. spicing up your sex life. But we don’t talk about how to masturbate. We are the generation that talk… Read more »

Have you heard of Orgasmic Meditation or OM for short? It was mentioned to us by one of our female clients. Orgasmic Meditation is taught by an organisation based in the US but there seems to be a branch in London also. The whole idea of Orgasmic Meditation is to slow down, which is something we have written about in previous articles here According to their website, it is something you practice with a partner and it is equally powerful for both partners – the object of focus for both partners is the clitoris. They say that the practice strips away more and more layers of conditioning, fear and ..personality, so that the most tender parts of ourselves can touch the world. The website also contains intriguing articles on subjects like: ‘Why Men like Porn and Women like Vibrators’ which states that for both men and women there is a quality of hunger that is unmet, an itch that is not getting scratched. Orgasmic Meditation hold courses in the US and there are also meetings in London on Wednesday and Friday evenings. In the US, there are also advanced Orgasmic Meditation classes where ‘you will peak behind the curtain of… Read more »

The clitoris is described as the only human body part that exists solely for pleasure. It is not merely a little ‘button’ hidden between a woman’s legs, but rather a large, mostly internal organ many people dont know about. New York artist, Sophia Wallace has created a multi-media art project entitled “Cliteracy” According to Wallace, the clitoris was only scientifically discovered in 1998. Although the clitoris did appear in scientific literature in the mid-1800’s, it is only recently that an Australian urologist named Helen O’Connel published a paper describing its sheer scope and size. She specified that the unerect clitoris, most of which is subterranean, could be up to 9 cms long. In the image above, the internal clitoris is highlighted in yellow. Sophia Wallace notes how curious it is that the female form is idolized for its sexuality and is broadcast all around us in art and advertising, and yet the clitoris, which is the true female sexual organ, is virtually invisible. Not only that, but many women feel embarrassed to ask men to pleasure them, and feel that they are asking for a huge favour. ‘It is insane to me’ she says that this should still… Read more »

Osho, formerly known as Rajneesh, introduced his version of Tantra to the West in the 1960’s. He was controversial, but he was an intelligent and prolific writer. Here are some quotes from Osho: Tantra is the natural way to God, the normal way to God. The object is to become so completely instinctual, so mindless, that we merge with ultimate nature – that the woman disappears and becomes a door for the ultimate, the man disappears and becomes a door for the ultimate…This is the tantric definition of our sexuality: the return to absolute innocence, absolute oneness. The greatest sexual thrill is not a search for thrills, but a silent waiting, utterly relaxed, utterly mindless. One is conscious, conscious only of being conscious. One is consciousness. One is contented but there is no content to it. And then there is a great beauty, great benediction. Question: ‘What is tantric sex… a sex which is a meditation based on certain techniques?’ Osho: If you are too technique oriented, you will miss the mystery of Tantra. It is pseudo-Tantra that is based on techniques, because if techniques are there, ego will be controlling. Then you will be doing it – and… Read more »

Sir Richard Branson, who founded Virgin Group, is one of Britain’s best known and most colourful entrepreneurs. Not many people will remember that his first venture, at the age of 16, was a magazine called Student. In 1970, he set up a mail-order record business and in 1972 opened Virgin Records, later known as Virgin Megastores. In the 1980’s he set up Virgin Atlantic and later, Virgin Trains. He is currently supporting the Google Impact Challenge in the UK, saying that nurturing new tech talents is one of the best ways to make a better, faster world. He will be judging the campaign for non-profits using tech to tackle the world’s toughest problems. He is quoted as saying :”Many of the world’s toughest challenges will be solved by bright, ambitious people developing ideas in their bedroom. I dont think he was referring to tantric sex.

‘A Search In Secret India’ by Paul Brunton – excerpts Paul Brunton (1898-1981) was a British philosopher, mystic and traveller. His ‘Search in Secret India’ and the other books he wrote, had a major influence on the spread of Eastern yoga and mysticism to the West. Here he is putting questions to Ramana Maharshi: “You mean that it is perfectly possible to conduct such mental investigation into oneself?” “Assuredly! It is possible to go inwards until the last thought ‘I ‘ gradually vanishes.” What is left?” I query. “Will a man then become quite unconscious, or will he become an idiot?” “Not so! On the contrary, he will attain that consciousness which is immortal, and he will become truly wise, when he has awakened to his true self, which is the real nature of man.” “But surely the sense of ‘ I’ must also pertain to that?” I persist. “The sense of ‘ I’ pertains to the person, the body and brain,” replies the Maharishee calmly. ” When a man knows his true self for the first time, something else arises from the depths of his being and takes possession of him. That… Read more »

This is taken from an article in Huffington Post entitled 10 spiritually transmitted diseases by Mariana Caplan. Those who have been reading the articles in my blog will be aware of my thoughts on developments in the world of tantric massage and spirituality in general, so you may recognise that the thoughts expressed by Mariana Caplan on the subject of spiritually transmitted diseases are totally after my own heart. I wont quote her article word for word, but will include the points which stand out. Faux Spritituality The tendency to talk,dress and act as we imagine a spiritual person would. A kind of imitation spirituality.. Confused Motivations Although our desire to grow is genuine and pure, it often gets mixed with the wish to be loved, the desire to belong, the need to fill our inner emptiness, the belief that the spiritual path will remove our suffering….. Identifying with Spiritual Experiences The ego identifies with spiritual experiences and takes them as its own. The Spiritualized Ego When the ego becomes spiritualized, we become ‘bullet-proof’ and invulnerable to help,new input or constructive feedback. Mass Production of Spritual Teachers No need to say more on this one. Spiritual Pride A feeling… Read more »

On how to slow down I was struck recently by an article written by Carl Honore, on the subject of slow sex.. He writes: ‘The other day a buddy of mine was making love to his new girlfriend when her IPhone beeped with an incoming text message. Like any guy, he hoped she would ignore the alert – or even fail to notice it altogether. The opposite happened. The woman opened her eyes, grabbed the phone from the bedside table and read the message. She then typed out a short reply. “To be fair, she apologised and suggested we go back to the sex” says my crestfallen friend, ” But it was kind of a mood-killer.” Two conclusions can be drawn from an anecdote like this. The first is that my friend maybe needs to brush up on his sexual technique. The second is that his girlfriend’s behaviour reveals something alarming about the way we live nowadays. In this media-drenched, mutitasking, always-on age, many of us have forgotten how to unplug and immerse ourselves completely in the moment. We have forgotten how to slow down.’ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/carl–honore/in-praise-of-slow–sex_b_322026.html The reason this article attracted my attention was that this used to happen… Read more »

The following is really a joke involving senior sex and nothing whatsoever to do with tantra The husband leans over and asks his wife, “Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.” Yes, she says, “I remember it well.” OK, he says, “How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time’s sake?” “Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!” A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I’ve got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I’ll just keep an eye on them so there’s no trouble. So he follows them. The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves… Read more »

The above cartoon typifies the ’emotionally unavailable’ man of the 1950’s as depicted in movies and tv programmes like ‘Mad Men’ If we look around today at the younger men who help with the cooking and looking after their babies, it seems that things have changed. But have they really? Maybe age old difference between men and women still exist: Women fall in love with what they hear.. and men fall in love with what they see. Woman begins by resisting a man’s advances and ends by blocking his retreat. Oscar Wilde. And dozens of articles are still written, giving advice on how to communicate with an emotionally unavailable partner. From the tantra point of view, all this happens because both men and women cannot connect with the love inside themselves. Love in relationship is a purifying process as it reveals the ways… Read more »

The majority of people who come to our Tantric Massage London Kensington clinic, both men and women, come on their own. Sometimes they tell their partner, but the majority do not, because they feel their partner may object, feel jealous, feel insecure, or simply will not understand why they should come to us. However, we are getting more and more brave couples who come together, as a couple, to enhance the sensual side of their relationship. I call them brave, because it does require courage for a woman to have her partner lie on a massage table, and be aroused to orgasm by another woman, even if that woman is a tantric masseuse. In the same way, it takes courage for a man to admit that he could improve his skills and be taught how to give more pleasure to his wife. And they are also brave because, rather than give up trying to work on their relationship,and come to us secretly, they come openly and united as a couple. Once the initial step has been taken, and inhibitions and fears have been set aside, and the appointment has been made, couples do feel so many benefits. Here is… Read more »

I thought about the above quote today, because we had a client who asked me about tantra practice. When I asked him what he meant, his answer was that he didnt at present, have a partner. This answer didnt really make sense to me, and I told him that I thought he should think about what he was really trying to say. In my opinion, the majority of clients who come to us for a tantric massage really want a nice sensual massage. or erotic massage. And there is nothing wrong with that. But some of them dont like to admit it, and use all the tantric terminology, without really understanding it – maybe because they feel shy or embarrassed, and this is their way of covering up that uncomfortable feeling. Very few are really interested in Tantra in the true sense. And that is also fine. But I do think that it is good to be honest with oneself. Because only then can we feel comfortable in our own skin. Here is a lovely quote from Ramana Maharshi, when he was questioned in his ashram: Visitor: What is the method to… Read more »

Tantric massage for women is far less requested than for men. It seems that the majority of men have few qualms about being adventurous and trying out something new in the feld of sensual exploration. But what about women? Are they more cautious? Are their needs different? There are several tantric groups and workshops available where both women and men can go and take part for a few hours, or for a weekend, or for several weekends, in programmes where they are taught to communicate more clearly and honestly, and to get in touch with their senses and feelings in a more profound and deeper way. But they usually dont get to give or receive a tantric massage until they have progressed and participated in a determined number of these workshops. The clients who come to us are people who want to receive a one on one massage and in the main, are not attracted to participating in a group. But these workshops may be ideal for many other men or women who want to work on different personal issues, or who may initially find the idea of receiving a tantric massage from a total stranger, a little too threatening. Celeste… Read more »

Surrender to God is advocated by many of the world’s religious traditions It is considered a means of transcending the individual self. But the word surrender is often misunderstood. What we want most in life is to be right. And we want to know that we are right. But one of life’s most bittersweet moments is when we finally realise that we don’t have it all figured out. Everyone with an ounce of self awareness eventually figures out there’s a price to pay to be right. The two quotes below may shed some light on this. Whatever is destined not to happen will not happen, try as you may .Whatever is destined to happen will happen, do what you may to prevent it.That is certain. The best course, therefore, is to remain silent. Ramana Maharshi Everything changes from moment to moment, so why spend so much time and energy worrying about… Read more »

Yearly Archives: 2013

A letter to my son about porn

Nelson Mandela – the passing of a great being

BE THE PEACE

Masters of Sex on Channel 4

Goodbye to Tara

Gentleman’s Willy Care Kit

Girls masturbate. Why don’t we talk about it?

Orgasmic Meditation

The truth about the Clitoris

Osho and Sex

Virgin

Secret India

Spiritually Transmitted Diseases

Tantric Massage London – What does it really mean to slow down?

Tantra and Senior Sex

Tantra – and the emotionally unavailable man

Tantric Massage London in Kensington – Part 3 – Tantric Tuition for Couples

Clients who come for a Tantric Massage

Tantric Massage for Women – What do women really want ?

The real meaning of ‘Surrender’

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